I keep seeing her. The other day I was walking towards my gf and waved to her and this girl was behind the gf, and saw me. I’d seen her before and I know she’s noticed me. When I waved, for a second I think she thought I was waving at her. She looked the gf up and down and seemed impressed. Sometimes having an attractive gf is good thing, and gets other girls more interested in you. Time to break the ice with her.

Over the last year I’ve taken on greater responsibility while working at a lab and have found myself in a leadership position amongst younger men and women. This experience has been amazing for me and enlightening on many levels. For one thing, I’ve learn a lot about myself and have come to realize how much I enjoy leadership, mentoring, and also that I have a talent for these things. One piece of this learning has to do with my understanding of younger women interacting with strong male leaders and role models. I think that these interactions have informed me not only of how these younger women view me, but it also informs me of how women in the world (especially younger women) may view me generally.

For one thing, when you’re in a leadership role with a younger woman, there’s an automatic power dynamic which you can, and I say must, own and respect. It shouldn’t be underestimated, and I should stress that there is a correlation between how reserved and in the role you are and how much they want you. They want to be the special one who gains your favor and attention. You’re the older, wiser, and more experienced man. What they want deep down is to earn your respect and to be seen as special in your eyes.

What they don’t want you to be the horny older guy who only has fucking them on their mind and who immediately tries to start getting into their pants. They will hold all of the cards and they’ll immediately lose respect for you. Some of them will crush on you hard and want to fuck you. Some will chase you and try to get what they want. Some will see you as nothing more than a mentor. They respect you implicitly and look up to you. Regardless of the circumstances, just lay back and go with the flow. When you hold your head high above their flirtations, they want you even more. And they respect you more. You win and you win. For some, you are their special challenge. You can mildly acknowledge their flirts and let them glance off. If they really want it, they’ll let you know and you can make the decision to act or not at that time. You never try and make it happen first. Remember,

You demonstrate your power when you exercise self-control.

***

Here’s a recent example from my life. One of the younger women I work with is of eastern European descent, and is quite foxy. She’s crushing on me and has been since we met. Her interest really piqued when I mentioned that I had an asian gf. I was giving her some instructions in the lab one day, it was just she and I alone in the room, and she looked up at me, batted her eyes, and in her flirtatious and pouty way said,

“And what if I don’t want to?”

I barely acknowledged this blatant flirt. This made her juices get flowing instantly. She started asking about my life, my gf, etc., wanting to know more about me. A couple of days later she emailed me out of the blue to continue an email conversation we’d started a week before. Clearly a flimsy excuse to get in touch with me. I can easily see her coming up with some excuse for us to work alone sometime when her bf isn’t around or something. I’m not sure if I want to go down that road or not. Knowing she wants me and feeling the power of that is pretty awesome in and of itself. And I genuinely enjoy the professional relationship for what it is, despite the fact that I’ve already imagined fucking her ample bosom. I’m a complicated man.

***

Regardless of whether you make it work to your sexual advantage or not, you can enjoy the fruits of leading and mentoring younger women. And of course you can and should share your wisdom and knowledge with younger men. I firmly believe that’s one of the only ways the world will improve, by men teaching younger men to be stronger, and to have self-control. And it is the same with our women, they need to be taught and encouraged properly. The less I give to these girls, the more they want from me, and the more they’re willing to give me to get what they want. This doesn’t necessarily need to be sexual at all. The possibility of sex is always there.

Importantly, I try and keep this mindset, generally speaking, with all women, especially much younger ones. When I do it seems that things are as nature intended. It keeps my head on straight and prevents me from rushing headlong into the abyss.

Remember,

The more self-control a man has, the more he can have of everything else.

“When a woman rejects a guy’s openly sexual advances, it’s going to reveal one of four things about him:

A) He is going to keep pushing her for what he wants, which will reveal him as needy and desperate. Very unattractive.

B) He is going to cave in, be absolutely devastated, and reveal that his confidence was fake. Very unattractive.

C) He is going to get very upset, and reveal that he constantly fails, shown by his frustration. Very unattractive.

Or

D) He is going to stay calm, relax, and act as if the rejection never happened.”

***

I haven’t been able to comment on your site despite repeated attempts. I think the Blogger site has something wrong with it. I don’t think I’m alone in not being able to comment on Blogger sites. I’ve tried several ways. Anyhow man, you might not be getting as much comment traffic as you could be if that were working properly. I don’t see another way to contact you, hence the post.

I’ll still smack her ass, kiss her, and get her juices flowing, but then I stop. Or I’ll finger her until she gets off but deny her the dick, pushing her head down to give me a bj. Which of course she loves to do.

Eventually she’ll pounce on me and will be so ravenous that I might not even recognize her. She’ll be amped up, confused as to why I haven’t been dying to bone her, and will push herself on me. This adds a nice element to the sex, and keeps things fresh.

Sometimes, you might not be sexing her because you’re doing other things, whether it be work, other projects, or other women. Regardless of the reason, it’ll push her buttons. Of course, you can’t do it too long, and you can’t actually refuse her advances, you just pull back after you’ve amped her up. You’re the ball of string, and she’s the cat.

Women love challenges. Scarcity and abundance.

Later a guy came over and asked if he could have the other chair so his girl could sit down. I was expecting my friend any minute so I told him politely that we were expecting someone. A little later my friend texted that he was on the way and I knew it’d be a while before he’d get there.

“Hey, if you want this chair for your girlfriend, take it. My friend will be a little while.”

“Thanks man, I appreciated it.”

Girl sits down, smiles, all is right with the world. Later when my friend comes, he decides to stand as he’d been sitting down a lot earlier, so there was no need to get it from them. A couple times that night I saw the girl look at me with admiration. I could tell the guy really appreciated that his girl could sit down. I have no idea if it was a first date, ltr, or whatever. Regardless, when the guy and girl left, they both thanked me sincerely for letting her have the chair.

“Do you have another pair of shoes for the office?”

“No.”

“You should go back up and get another pair to wear, those really don’t go with your outfit.”

“Okay.”

She said this without malice or grievance, and of course I told her all of this because I don’t think she realized how she looked given that she changed in a hurry. I want my woman to look her best and I’m not going to just sit there silent and have her walking around with those things on. She went up and got a pair of nice black boots and put them on, leaving the grungy snow boots in her apartment. She laughed and commented that I was stern with her, but not in a complaining way. She both a) enjoys that I am looking out for her, and b) wants to please me. Emphasis is on the latter.

In moments like these I feel like a Don Draper telling Betty to take off the new swimsuit she has because it’s too revealing and, “looks desperate.” I’m the man. I speak, and she listens.

Gentlemen, can you imagine this interaction with your common feminist-infested Western woman? You can just imagine the trouble can’t you?

And to all of you feministas out there, you can suck it. That is all.

[First of all, I should note that I have never read anything by Max, haven't seen the movie, haven't read the interviews. I first heard of him a year ago, ironically from a 23 year old I was trying to hook up with at a bar. A few months later I was talking to some friends and he came up, and it turns out that they went to high school with him. Small world. At any rate, I have no special connection to Max, no connection at all really, other than the fact that we are about the same age (I'm 36) and so I suppose I might relate in some ways to him on a generational level. Okay, now that that's out of the way...]

Here’s the thing. Max is doing, ironically, what I presume he has always done, and that is what he wants to do, regardless of expectations. So it’s too bad for a generation of twenty-somethings that were inspired by him and now feel that he’s left them in the lurch. It’s likely that they felt so inspired by him in the first place because he was telling them exactly what they wanted to hear, things that they had already suspected. He gave them an excuse to do what they already wanted to do. I’m pretty sure every generation of young men latches on to someone similar in this way. For me, it was musicians.

And now Tucker is doing his own thing, again. From what I’ve read in Frost’s posts, he’s doing yoga and psychotherapy. Good for him I say. It’s not just the fact that I have done both of those things, and continue to do yoga that I say good for him, I say it because he’s doing it for the right reasons: because it’s what’s right for him at this moment in time.

Here’s a big irony: what Max is doing now is setting a positive example for all of the guys that were following him, and showing them the inevitable: you grow older, things change, your perspectives change, and you change. You start to see much younger women who are half your age as what they are: clueless young girls who properly need your leadership more than they need your cock. (Ironically, the more you give them the former and withhold the latter, the more they want the latter. I’m not above giving the latter to them, I’m just pointing out a reality.) You begin to realize that at the end of the day you have to live with yourself, and the decisions you make, the personal bridges you burn, do matter. Treating people like objects has its consequences.

So Tucker Max may not be writing any more funny, goofball stories about getting drunk and banging slutty babes, but perhaps he’s cluing his readers in to something else, something better. I doubt he’ll keep silent forever. Perhaps he’ll start writing vastly more introspective stuff as can be found on the internet, and perhaps he’ll be ignored by those who only want to be told what they already think and feel is correct. Second to pornography, that is by and large what the internet is for: confirming what you already want to think and believe.

I don’t particularly respect Max, or think he has anything insightful to say, nor do I plan to read or keep up with him. I honestly don’t give a shit about him one way or the other, and don’t care if he’s doing well or not, but I will give a nod to anyone that breaks with expectations to do what’s right for themselves. Nevertheless, from what I’m reading, it sounds like he’s doing the right thing. When you set aside what everyone else thinks and expects of you and do what is right for you, you have risen.

I don’t deny that there are many pleasures a man may attain, and that many are worthwhile. Yet for many of those pursuits, all sustenance is drained from after a time. When compared to the sustenance of friendship, loyalty, trust, and honor, they begin to pale in the long run. The sustenance of these things are an important component of a strong man. Remember,

Weak men and women try to bend the world to match their insecurities; Strong men remain steadfast in their resolve when faced with adversity.

“What is it that makes a strong man?”, you’ve asked me, and I will tell you something in reply. A man honors his commitments, and honors his word. If he cannot do a thing, he will not say that he can. Of course we all make mistakes and in confusion offer a stray commitment, but for a strong man these are a rare thing. Some will say, “Oh look, he can’t make up his mind, whether to do the thing or not,” but I tell you there are so many who will quickly commit themselves in word, with no intention of actually doing the thing. A man that doesn’t answer, “yes I can do that” at every turn is a man of quality, a man that will only tell you that he can do a thing if he can in fact do it. This, of course, is easier said than done, and takes time and experience. Hence why I urge you to weigh out your decisions carefully, to speak only when you have something to say. When you look a man in the eye, he will know that what you say is your mind, and that when you make an oath, you mean it. This is part of what it means to be a strong man.

So I urge you again to look over what you spend your time on. Be careful of the easy things that appear free, for they may entangle you and rob you, dipping their fingers into the pockets for your time and effort. They’ll leave you wasted, on the side of the road, with nothing to show for your trouble but more trouble, and without a steady thought to brace yourself against them. Such are the costs of so many things that distract us.

Farewell for now, my young friend.

It didn’t hold their interest long and as he’d recorded a Cary Grant/Ingrid Berman movie from 1958 called Indiscreet, on a whim, they decided to watch that instead. It exceeded his expectations. Ingrid is lovely in it, of course, but he was amazed at how suave and smooth Grant was. Not that he’d expect anything less from Cary Grant, it was just so spot on with how a man should handle himself. And then later you find out that he has a secret, that he totally has game (I won’t spoil it here). In the end, he does a reversal, but it’s still a good movie. While they watched he made some popcorn on the stove, old-fashioned is always best for popcorn. A little while later he decided to have a snifter of brandy. She had a bit as well, and it being so strong she got tipsy fast. All evening his hand had been on her thigh and knee, the tights giving that tactile feeling that only they can give and his hand gradually worked its way down to between her legs, but he stopped just before there, teasing her.

When the movie was over he stood up, took her by the hand and simply said, “Come with me.” He led her to the bedroom where he suddenly drew her close to him and kissed her. Then, putting his hand in her long, dark hair, and grabbing a handful, pulling her head back, exposing her neck more fully, he kissed and bit her neck. Then suddenly he turned her quickly around. Foreplay was over. He bent her over the bed, lifted the taffeta skirt, and pulled the tights and panties down, undid his belt and zipper, pulled his jeans and boxers down, exposing his already hard dick and put himself inside her. She moaned and was already wet, and she came quickly. He looked down, placing his hands on her hips, thrusting into her, pulling her towards him, enjoying the way her perfect ass felt in his hands and also how she was grinding up against him. He thought of a younger woman at work that had a crush on him, who was flirtatious and who he wanted to fuck. Then he’d look down and see his girl’s perfect ass and he smiled to himself, as he was having it all. He came hard and fast inside of her as she came again. He stayed inside of her for a little while, then pulled out and led her to the bathroom where they took a shower.

Wondering if anyone else has had similar experiences? In general, I favor not having the coffee habitually. It actually does its job well when I have it sparingly. I am also wondering if the lower sex drive is because of the time of year.